Balance
For as long as I can remember, I have been chasing the next thing whether that be the next goal, the next project, or the next milestone. I have come to realize that there is a lot of value in moments of pause. Not only do moments of pause create room for rest and prevent long term burnout but they also create space for reflection and intentionality. Learning to carve out time for my mental and physical health has increased my ability to reflect and set meaningful goals. I have learned how to cook nourishing meals for myself, carve out time for play in nature, and iterate on my learning process. In doing so, I have been able to find more balance and holistic fulfillment in my life. This has been a continuous unlearning of rigid notions of success that are rooted in ideals of toxic productivity and hustle culture. I still pursue projects and goals that I feel passionate about with as much zest as ever. But, my approach has changed. I lean mindfully into the learning process and tap into my curiosity as a way to cultivate a more sustainable process. This practice has been instrumental in building my self-confidence and giving me the space to grow into a more authentic version of myself.
I struggled a lot with my coursework during my first few quarters at UW. As an Engineering and Honors student, I was taking a variety of rigorous classes. It was difficult at first because it took me a moment to settle in to the quarter system and learn how to effectively study. My first few Math, Chemistry, and Physics classes really took a toll on me because I didn't know how to study for them. I found my grades slipping. This was particularly difficult for me because I didn't know what I was doing wrong. I felt a crippling fear of failure. It also impacted my feelings of self-worth and self-confidence. Physically, my stress contributed to an intense period of insomnia.
I took a moment of pause and committed to iterating on my learning process. I began to try different approaches which helped me identify what strategies worked well. I began attending office hours, doing lots of practice exams, and managing my time between classes well. I noticed my grades improve. Simultaneously, I tried to separate my identify from my grades and focus instead on the joy of learning something new. I leaned into practices like mindfulness and meditation to practice detaching myself from the outcomes of my work. I learned to prioritize my mental and physical health by leaning into my community and taking better care of myself.
When I started college, I was deeply committed to my learning and education. Sometimes, even to a fault. I wasn't eating consistently or working out on a regular basis. Most of my time during the week would be spent studying or working on projects. I felt burnt out relatively quickly. I noticed this during fall quarter of my freshman year and decided that I would start preparing meals for myself as a first step to looking after myself. This has been a non-linear journey. There have been times in my life when it was easy to cook or meal prep for myself. But other times when I found myself swamped in coursework, I was more focused on eating whatever I had access to at the dining halls. Over time, I worked on building my knowledge around nutrition and wellness and found more consistency in meal prepping. Cooking for myself has brought me a lot of joy. It has felt like an act of self love.
My freshman year, I started with simple sandwiches. Once I moved into an apartment, I had access to a bigger kitchen. I started to add more recipes into the rotation like quinoa bowls with roasted vegetables, avocado toast with kimchi, tofu stir fry, and butterbean curry with kale. Taking time to cook and meal prep felt restful. It was the perfect pause to reflect on my week. It not only significantly improved my energy levels but also taught me the importance of a balanced lifestyle.
Academics
Health & Wellness
My freshman year, I started practicing yoga in my dorm room. It helped me relax and find joy in simple movements. I enjoyed yoga and meditation so much that I decided to apply for a Yoga Teacher Training program the end of my sophomore year. The summer after my sophomore year, I completed my 200 Hours Yoga Teacher Training through the UW's Recreation Program. This was truly a transformative experience. Not only did it deepen my meditation and mindfulness practice but it also taught me the foundations of stretching. It inspired me to add more physical movement in my routine. I bought a Recreation Pass my junior year and began to attend yoga and fitness classes at the Intramural Activities Building (IMA). Freshman year me was so intimidated by the gym on campus. Fast forward to junior year— I was taking swim lessons, attending yoga classes, and strength training regularly. Integrating movement into my routine helped me find more balance in my life and gave me the chance to take pauses outside of school to better care for my body. I found myself returning to my coursework and projects with more energy. Reaching outside of my comfort zone when attending fitness classes also made me more comfortable with trying new things without expecting perfection. This also translated directly to my coursework where I found myself getting more comfortable with trying difficult things.
